Tired of resilience? Try receiving instead.


The other day I was using some down time to scroll through social media and saw someone post about being tired of being lauded for being resilient. They wanted a softer approach. Something that created ease more than opportunities to prove over and over how strong they are.

Releasing the need for resilience is at the core of shifting from being a doer/maker to an allower/receiver.

And it’s one of the reasons why receiving can be such a challenge. Our culture clearly celebrates those who “push through”, those who have a story of suffering that they have turned into joy and achievement.

I love reading those stories as much as anyone else.

But I think we are celebrating those stories for the wrong reason.

Those stories strike home because we are wired to want more than what is currently in our present moment. Not because we are greedy, but because wanting something new creates the need to expand to align with our new goal and that expansion, in turn, expands the Universe. We are hardwired to want expansion.

When someone shifts out of struggle into joy and achievement, their expansion is clear. They were at point A and now they are at point B. But instead of simply celebrating their expansion, as a culture we celebrate their suffering and their hard work.

We celebrate the process rather than the end result.

We celebrate their resilience rather than the expansion.

The process of expansion does not have to include suffering. When we wear the cloak of “I have to make “x” happen”, or, “I have to prove…”, or, “I have to figure this all out…,” or, “this hard work will pay off one day,” or, “the truly successful are hard workers….” we are in the make/do model of creation.

This model takes us out of alignment with our true selves and the Divine. And it creates deep exhaustion..

When you choose instead to be an allower and receiver, you still take action. You still move from point A to point B. You still experience expansion. But, you do it from a place of connection – with Self, the Divine, and community.

No suffering necessary.

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